We all have heard the cliche phrase, put it in God's hands and he'll provide. I always thought people who believed that were so naive to believe in something so simplistic. As if it were that easy. Well, as a culture of people who love to get rich quick and have our needs met yesterday, it seems like putting things in God's hands would be the first thing we would jump in line to do.
Yeah, not so much.
Over the last 5 weeks I have started going to a local Presbyterian church in town. I have not been an active participant of a church for almost 23 years. That is a very long time to let your spiritual life languish.
When I moved from Kalamazoo, Michigan to Duluth, Minnesota in December 2010 it was just me and the Big Man in the car for those 700+ miles. I was terrified pulling the uhaul trailer, it was winter time and I was white knuckling the steering wheel the entire way. I frequently prayed aloud in the car asking for strength, courage and perseverance. He provided. He MORE than provided.
I made God a promise that day in the car that when I got to Duluth, I would find a church. I would become an active member in the church and renew my faith.
In February and March I struggled with severe headaches. I was truly scared. I saw doctors, I did what they said, but moreover, I PRAYED. I didn't pray for things to go away, I didn't pray for any kind of miracle. What I prayed for was Strength to go on, Courage to see new ways to deal with my pain, and Patience with others so that I wouldn't lash out at them in my pain.
He provided.
Tonight I got a piece of mail from the bank that is managing the health savings account I used to have at my old job in Michigan. When I opened it it showed I had $80.00 available to me for medical benefit spending.
I began to cry. Not tears of sadness, but tears of extreme and unexplained JOY. This week was payday and suffice to say after paying bills, buying gas and groceries there was not enough money to purchase the two prescriptions that I need. I resolved myself to the fact that it would just have to wait until next payday.
I did however, pray this weekend and I did exactly what others have spoke of....I turned it ALL over to God. It truly is/was out of my hands. I said that I knew he would help find a way to make ends meet and I knew that I would be okay. I didn't have any concrete evidence or a laid out perfect plan, but I just KNEW it would be okay.
And low and behold today...my HSA card comes with money still available to me from when my employer and I put in my last contribution at the end of November. I was overwhelmed with gratitude.
The funniest part is that the money has been there the entire time, but they only send statements quarterly, so this is the first time I have saw a statement in a very long time. The Magnitude and wonderment of it is that it arrived NOW after I had prayed and stopped worrying about my personal needs.
Truly AMAZING.
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