I have been struggling for quite some time with this whole notion of "rising above" or taking "the high road" when it comes to interacting in a situation I find uncomfortable or with a person I believe "should" be acting in a different way.
I realize what I see in another that I don't care for may be traits in myself that I don't care for. Instead of expecting the other person to change or the situation to improve I have come to realize I need to make changes. I need to take the high road, make the right choices and above all LOVE the other person.
At first I resented this notion and was pretty bitter I had to do all the leg work, I had to make the sacrifices. Why me? Why did things have to be so hard all the time?
I got to thinking about how the greatest commandment is:
"Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself"
I haven't been a very loving neighbor. I have been incredibly judgmental and isolated my neighbor through my own selfish actions.
I was falling short on the love my neighbor business. It is not love thy neighbor you like most or have the most in common with...it is love thy neighbor PERIOD.
Many of us choose the path of least resistance because it just feels so much better. I have been guilty of this because nobody enjoys being uncomfortable or confronting those parts of ourselves we don't really want to see. It was easier to blame the other person for their "faults" as opposed to embracing my own shortcomings when it came to faithfully and tactfully interacting with this other person.
I needed to step back and look at myself ~ truthfully and honestly LOOK at myself. I was being so unkind and unfair to someone because they communicate differently than I do, their view on the world is somewhat different than mine, and our personalities are dramatically different.
Instead of seeing this as an opportunity to build a bridge or to bridge a gap in our relationship, I allowed our differences to drive a wedge between us which is not a very Christian like thing to do.
It is not acceptable to turn away and write someone off just because I don't want to follow a commandment that I know in my heart I should. Shame on me. I will no longer allow myself to be that person. I will joyfully take the "right" road from here on out.
I thought long and hard about this over the weekend. I prayed for positivity, perseverance and patience. I wanted to be positive towards this person. I wanted to be more patient with this person as well as with myself. I wanted to be able to persevere because I knew it would not be an easy task and I may fall down repeatedly along the way. I have struggled with my interactions with this person for months and finally I found my answer ~~ LOVE your neighbor.
It isn't always easy to love - it takes courage, fortitude, strength and above all Faith. I challenge you during this "season of love - aka Valentine's Day" to truly LOVE with all your heart and soul.
Monday, February 13, 2012
Saturday, January 21, 2012
I am the Quarterback of My Life...
The question I have been asked the most lately is this: "What made you decide to convert to Catholicism?"
I was not prepared for such questioning. I was not expecting people to inquire about my reasoning for this journey.
Of course when you are put on the spot you stammer around with answers like, "well, I work for a Catholic entity, I have many Catholic friends....." and then it just trails off from there and they are left staring blankly at me probably thinking, "she works for a Catholic entity and she has Catholic friends? So what???"
My answer now is easy: Faith should not be a spectator sport
Up until recently, I have always been a fair weather fan in the stands. Warming the pew on the rare Sunday I did attend church. I was always removed from the action. I could see the field and the other key players, but definitely was not suited up for the Big Game.
It was always more comfortable or easier to go through the motions of church. I had convinced myself that merely attending was good enough to get me into heaven. I believed if I was not committing the "Big Sins" then surely, I must be alright.
I never believed I needed to engage at a deeper core level. It was perfectly acceptable to me to either not go to church at all or just be a second stringer for a mediocre team.
You cannot expect great results in your life without great effort and enthusiasm on your part. Catholicism has stoked a once small almost non-existent flame into a roaring inner fire that cannot be tamed.
Catholicism is a way for me to fully engage my talents, strengths, emotions and above all love for God. It is steeped with rich tradition and it inspires me each time I attend mass. I love the involvement in the mass whether it's through making the sign of the cross, the genuflecting, the adoration of the tabernacle, kneeling in prayer, participating in the Eucharist or even as simple as passing the peace with a fellow parishioner.
Hence, I am now the Quarterback of my life. I am calling the plays, I am making the big decisions. I am no longer a spectator but a key player in my Super Bowl of faithful journeys.
I may not have the stats or moves of Aaron Rodgers, but I am definitely the MVP of my big game.
I was not prepared for such questioning. I was not expecting people to inquire about my reasoning for this journey.
Of course when you are put on the spot you stammer around with answers like, "well, I work for a Catholic entity, I have many Catholic friends....." and then it just trails off from there and they are left staring blankly at me probably thinking, "she works for a Catholic entity and she has Catholic friends? So what???"
My answer now is easy: Faith should not be a spectator sport
Up until recently, I have always been a fair weather fan in the stands. Warming the pew on the rare Sunday I did attend church. I was always removed from the action. I could see the field and the other key players, but definitely was not suited up for the Big Game.
It was always more comfortable or easier to go through the motions of church. I had convinced myself that merely attending was good enough to get me into heaven. I believed if I was not committing the "Big Sins" then surely, I must be alright.
I never believed I needed to engage at a deeper core level. It was perfectly acceptable to me to either not go to church at all or just be a second stringer for a mediocre team.
You cannot expect great results in your life without great effort and enthusiasm on your part. Catholicism has stoked a once small almost non-existent flame into a roaring inner fire that cannot be tamed.
Catholicism is a way for me to fully engage my talents, strengths, emotions and above all love for God. It is steeped with rich tradition and it inspires me each time I attend mass. I love the involvement in the mass whether it's through making the sign of the cross, the genuflecting, the adoration of the tabernacle, kneeling in prayer, participating in the Eucharist or even as simple as passing the peace with a fellow parishioner.
Hence, I am now the Quarterback of my life. I am calling the plays, I am making the big decisions. I am no longer a spectator but a key player in my Super Bowl of faithful journeys.
I may not have the stats or moves of Aaron Rodgers, but I am definitely the MVP of my big game.
Monday, January 9, 2012
Personal Revelations
An epiphany reveals or makes known something that had been previously hidden.
I have kept many things hidden, not just from others but particularly from myself. I have hidden my guilt, shame, sadness and remorse over my failed past relationships. I have wanted to appear as though each ending of a significant chapter of my life has been on my terms. I have not wanted others to view me as fragile or broken.
Facts are I was broken. Facts are I still have parts of me which are broken.
In light of all the amazingly positive changes I have made over the last 18 months it is easy to overlook the notion I may indeed still be broken in places. It is easy to wake up each day with a smile and be grateful and go about my life without truly examining my past and thinking about making myself completely whole again.
As I continue my faith journey converting to Catholicism I am forced to look deep within myself and examine where I want my life to go. This is not a decision to enter into lightly, you are either all in or all out, there is no middle wishy-washy ground.
This week, had I stayed married, I would be celebrating my 16th anniversary. Every year in January I find myself reflecting on that time period in my life when I made the decision to get married. I also, reflect on the pain I inflicted on another human being through the hurtful divorce process.
Annually, I would put myself through this guilt process and beat myself up for decisions I made so long ago. The hardest part was I never really answered to anyone but myself. I let down my family, friends, my husband, myself...and never ever held myself accountable for my actions. I completely did what I wanted and selfishly only thought of myself and my needs in that moment.
God works in mysterious yet obvious ways. In all these years I have never atoned for what I did to my ex-husband. Yes, I asked him for forgiveness and thankfully he was able to find a place in his heart to forgive me. I have yet to find the way to forgive myself for my actions. I have carried this around for 16 long years. I have wanted to believe my divorce didn't bother me. I have wanted to keep hidden the embarassment and shame of my divorce.
Today, I am being asked to re-examine that time period. Today I am being asked to atone for my ways. Did anyone tell me I needed to do this? No, not outright. One night after my RCIA class at church it occurred to me that I would never be able to remarry again in good faith. Up until this point in my life I don't think I really cared whether or not I was in good standing with anyone because I had always thought just about me and my needs. When I left my husband I was not accountable to him, to my family, to my friends, to my church and certainly not to God.
Granted, it's not like men are lined up at my door dying for the opportunity to marry me in a beautiful Catholic church wedding, but maybe someday there may be a time when I want to remarry. I know in my heart if I were to remarry I would want a beautiful Catholic wedding and I would want to enter into marriage with all the sacredness that surrounds it.
I instantly knew what I had to do. I needed to begin the annulment process within the Catholic church. Did that sound like a fun thing to do? Of course not. Do I want to look back on a time in my life when I am not proud of my actions? Of course not.
EPIPHANY ~ seeing what was once hidden...I can now see that I am meant to stop hiding my past scars. I am meant to see myself for who I was back then and through the annulment process I will be able to finally forgive myself and move forward freely in my life. Forgiveness is a very powerful tool and until I can forgive myself for my past I'll never be able to be the best person I can be for my future. I also love that had I not found my way to the Catholic church and renewed my faith I would have never given my past relationship with my ex-husband another conscious thought. My guilt would have continued to fester quietly under the surface for an eternity each year eating away at my being.
I am thankful I am on this journey with God. I am grateful that I hear His voice quietly guiding me in a whispered hush as I take these first awkward and uncomfortable steps. It will be a long journey of inner reflection and revelations, but I know that I am not alone. I know that I can and will get through this and that I will be a better person for going through the process.
I have kept many things hidden, not just from others but particularly from myself. I have hidden my guilt, shame, sadness and remorse over my failed past relationships. I have wanted to appear as though each ending of a significant chapter of my life has been on my terms. I have not wanted others to view me as fragile or broken.
Facts are I was broken. Facts are I still have parts of me which are broken.
In light of all the amazingly positive changes I have made over the last 18 months it is easy to overlook the notion I may indeed still be broken in places. It is easy to wake up each day with a smile and be grateful and go about my life without truly examining my past and thinking about making myself completely whole again.
As I continue my faith journey converting to Catholicism I am forced to look deep within myself and examine where I want my life to go. This is not a decision to enter into lightly, you are either all in or all out, there is no middle wishy-washy ground.
This week, had I stayed married, I would be celebrating my 16th anniversary. Every year in January I find myself reflecting on that time period in my life when I made the decision to get married. I also, reflect on the pain I inflicted on another human being through the hurtful divorce process.
Annually, I would put myself through this guilt process and beat myself up for decisions I made so long ago. The hardest part was I never really answered to anyone but myself. I let down my family, friends, my husband, myself...and never ever held myself accountable for my actions. I completely did what I wanted and selfishly only thought of myself and my needs in that moment.
God works in mysterious yet obvious ways. In all these years I have never atoned for what I did to my ex-husband. Yes, I asked him for forgiveness and thankfully he was able to find a place in his heart to forgive me. I have yet to find the way to forgive myself for my actions. I have carried this around for 16 long years. I have wanted to believe my divorce didn't bother me. I have wanted to keep hidden the embarassment and shame of my divorce.
Today, I am being asked to re-examine that time period. Today I am being asked to atone for my ways. Did anyone tell me I needed to do this? No, not outright. One night after my RCIA class at church it occurred to me that I would never be able to remarry again in good faith. Up until this point in my life I don't think I really cared whether or not I was in good standing with anyone because I had always thought just about me and my needs. When I left my husband I was not accountable to him, to my family, to my friends, to my church and certainly not to God.
Granted, it's not like men are lined up at my door dying for the opportunity to marry me in a beautiful Catholic church wedding, but maybe someday there may be a time when I want to remarry. I know in my heart if I were to remarry I would want a beautiful Catholic wedding and I would want to enter into marriage with all the sacredness that surrounds it.
I instantly knew what I had to do. I needed to begin the annulment process within the Catholic church. Did that sound like a fun thing to do? Of course not. Do I want to look back on a time in my life when I am not proud of my actions? Of course not.
EPIPHANY ~ seeing what was once hidden...I can now see that I am meant to stop hiding my past scars. I am meant to see myself for who I was back then and through the annulment process I will be able to finally forgive myself and move forward freely in my life. Forgiveness is a very powerful tool and until I can forgive myself for my past I'll never be able to be the best person I can be for my future. I also love that had I not found my way to the Catholic church and renewed my faith I would have never given my past relationship with my ex-husband another conscious thought. My guilt would have continued to fester quietly under the surface for an eternity each year eating away at my being.
I am thankful I am on this journey with God. I am grateful that I hear His voice quietly guiding me in a whispered hush as I take these first awkward and uncomfortable steps. It will be a long journey of inner reflection and revelations, but I know that I am not alone. I know that I can and will get through this and that I will be a better person for going through the process.
Thursday, November 10, 2011
It may get dark sooner ~ but there is always Light...
The recent "fall back" time change has the days feeling shorter and the darkness creeping in earlier in the evening. This week I have found more light in these darker days and I feel completely on fire in my faith.
I have felt a little lost over the last month or so. I have been seeking solace not necessarily where I should have. I gave in to many temptations and during this time doubted myself and lost faith in who I am as a person. I am my own worst enemy and have judged myself harshly for my recent behavior.
Last week I made a choice to get myself back on track both emotionally, physically and above all spiritually.
This week I knew was going to be a tough week. I had major projects at work, I am still in a learning curve for my new job role, I was feeling uneasy about a relationship issue, I am nervous and consumed with my upcoming move....many things making me feel anxious and unsettled.
Sunday night I prayed for a long time. I did not ask God to help me speak better during my presentations this week, I didn't ask him to minimize the workload while my co-worker is on vacation, I didn't ask him to make my heart feel less wounded, I didn't ask him for anything tangible.
What I did was ask to be INSPIRED...I asked Him to be with me, to watch over me, to give me comfort in knowing that He is with me even when I feel like nobody else is there for me. I asked for help to continue to be courageous even when I feel totally afraid to face the day ahead.
This week has been one of the best weeks of my life. Work has been phenomenal...my heart is happy and my spirit is spunky again. I am totally "going with the flow" and doing the best I can because I know it's all going to be okay.
Tonight at my R.C.I.A. class (which I love so so so much) Father Eric asked if anyone would like to lead us in prayer at the close of our session together. I volunteered and said my first publicly spoken prayer and it just flowed from me...from my heart and soul. When I opened my eyes, Father Eric had tears in his eyes and he thanked me and said it was beautiful and moving.
Score! I love my job, my friends, my family, my faith, my amazingly beautiful life AND my God. Thank you for never leaving me and thank you for always illuminating my path and keeping my inner fire burning bright!!!
I have felt a little lost over the last month or so. I have been seeking solace not necessarily where I should have. I gave in to many temptations and during this time doubted myself and lost faith in who I am as a person. I am my own worst enemy and have judged myself harshly for my recent behavior.
Last week I made a choice to get myself back on track both emotionally, physically and above all spiritually.
This week I knew was going to be a tough week. I had major projects at work, I am still in a learning curve for my new job role, I was feeling uneasy about a relationship issue, I am nervous and consumed with my upcoming move....many things making me feel anxious and unsettled.
Sunday night I prayed for a long time. I did not ask God to help me speak better during my presentations this week, I didn't ask him to minimize the workload while my co-worker is on vacation, I didn't ask him to make my heart feel less wounded, I didn't ask him for anything tangible.
What I did was ask to be INSPIRED...I asked Him to be with me, to watch over me, to give me comfort in knowing that He is with me even when I feel like nobody else is there for me. I asked for help to continue to be courageous even when I feel totally afraid to face the day ahead.
This week has been one of the best weeks of my life. Work has been phenomenal...my heart is happy and my spirit is spunky again. I am totally "going with the flow" and doing the best I can because I know it's all going to be okay.
Tonight at my R.C.I.A. class (which I love so so so much) Father Eric asked if anyone would like to lead us in prayer at the close of our session together. I volunteered and said my first publicly spoken prayer and it just flowed from me...from my heart and soul. When I opened my eyes, Father Eric had tears in his eyes and he thanked me and said it was beautiful and moving.
Score! I love my job, my friends, my family, my faith, my amazingly beautiful life AND my God. Thank you for never leaving me and thank you for always illuminating my path and keeping my inner fire burning bright!!!
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Finding My Way ~ The Three R's
The last year has been filled with many significant changes. At this time last fall I was still living in lower Michigan waiting to hear if I got the job in Minnesota. It's mind blowing to think how much my life has changed and how far I have come in such a short period of time.
I believe the 3 R's summarizes the changes in my life and how I feel in this moment:
Rebirth: For many years I shut God out and didn't listen to what he was trying to say to me. I wanted everything MY way, and I wanted quick and easy answers and was angry that my life felt so hard and how things never seemed to go my way. I felt God had abandoned me and I was very angry with Him and closed my heart to Him. It was so much easier to play the victim and blame not only God but others for my lot in life.
The day of my gastric bypass surgery in August 2010 my surgeon asked me if he could pray with me prior to the procedure. I welcomed this and felt very comforted going into surgery. I would say this was the "turning" moment when I allowed God back into my life.
Renewal: My attitude of gratitude began in August 2010 with each pound I lost, it felt like an opportunity to examine the excess "baggage" I had been carrying around all those years. Each day I felt healthier, happier, and intensely grateful for the new life I had been granted.
Each day I would find one small thing to be grateful about, eventually one grew into two, and so forth. I vividly recall the moment when I realized the changes in my life were not about me. Yes, I was active in making the changes but ultimately the changes occurred because I started listening to the small voice inside me telling me I could. Telling me I could be anything I wanted. Telling me I could go anywhere I wanted and that there was nothing holding me back from a glorious life except ME.
This voice was God telling me that I was glorious and created in His image and so how could I be anything other than spectacular?
The chain of events that led me from Kalamazoo, Michigan to Duluth, MN could not and would not have happened unless God himself had orchestrated them. I fully recognize that and feel so blessed that I finally shut up and listened to that amazing voice calling me to the path I have always been drawn to but ignored until that day.
Rejuvenation: My spirit is very much rejuvenated today. I have began a whole new path in my spiritual life. I was raised in a Christian home and attended a Presbyterian church. For many years after college I avoided the church and had many questions.
When I moved to MN I made a promise to go back to church. I began at a Presbyterian Church which was filled with many beautiful people and was a very positive experience, although I still felt incomplete or that something was lacking.
The faith I am discerning is Catholicism. If someone said to me a year ago that I would actively seek the Catholic faith I probably would have slapped my knee in laughter. It would have seemed so out of my realm of possibility. I used to be so closed off to any other way of thinking other than what I already believed.
I am trying to determine exactly when I realized I wanted to learn more about the Catholic faith. I have thought long and hard about this and I realize over the last year I have been asking my close friend (who is Catholic) many questions about the differences between Protestantism and Catholicism.
It's not like anyone said to me, "hey, become Catholic, it's the greatest religion out there."
I don't think it's accidental in the big scheme of things that God drew me to Duluth and now I work for a Catholic hospital. I know it's no accident being drawn to the chapel weekly and sitting quietly in prayer and asking weekly for his guidance on my journey.
The day I went to mass this summer at a small Catholic church I remember this feeling of awesomeness washing over me. I remember taking it all in from the statues, the candles, the songs, the prayers, the ornate and gorgeous altar to just how it felt in that very moment to be part of the mass. I felt alive.
That feeling has not left me. That feeling has inspired me to join a Catholic church here in Duluth. I am now 6 weeks into the Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults (RCIA) where I am learning the rich history and traditions of the Catholic faith.
It is the most amazing gift I have ever given myself. My soul is rejuvenated on so many levels. For the very first time I feel the empty void in my heart has been filled. I could never explain the empty feeling. I always assumed it was material objects. Such as, if I had more money I would be happier. If I had this type of relationship, then I would be complete. If my job was like this, then I would be happier. It was none of those things.
I am finding when you open your heart to what God has planned for you...EVERYTHING falls into place....you are taken care of on every level. You are never alone so you never have to feel scared. You just have to have Faith that everything is how it is supposed to be according to His plan and that He loves you and will never, ever leave you. I have Faith that what is meant to be in my life is meant to be and will happen exactly when it is meant to happen.
I am Renewed. I am Reborn. I am Rejuvenated.
I believe the 3 R's summarizes the changes in my life and how I feel in this moment:
- Rebirth
- Renewal
- Rejuvenation
Rebirth: For many years I shut God out and didn't listen to what he was trying to say to me. I wanted everything MY way, and I wanted quick and easy answers and was angry that my life felt so hard and how things never seemed to go my way. I felt God had abandoned me and I was very angry with Him and closed my heart to Him. It was so much easier to play the victim and blame not only God but others for my lot in life.
The day of my gastric bypass surgery in August 2010 my surgeon asked me if he could pray with me prior to the procedure. I welcomed this and felt very comforted going into surgery. I would say this was the "turning" moment when I allowed God back into my life.
Renewal: My attitude of gratitude began in August 2010 with each pound I lost, it felt like an opportunity to examine the excess "baggage" I had been carrying around all those years. Each day I felt healthier, happier, and intensely grateful for the new life I had been granted.
Each day I would find one small thing to be grateful about, eventually one grew into two, and so forth. I vividly recall the moment when I realized the changes in my life were not about me. Yes, I was active in making the changes but ultimately the changes occurred because I started listening to the small voice inside me telling me I could. Telling me I could be anything I wanted. Telling me I could go anywhere I wanted and that there was nothing holding me back from a glorious life except ME.
This voice was God telling me that I was glorious and created in His image and so how could I be anything other than spectacular?
The chain of events that led me from Kalamazoo, Michigan to Duluth, MN could not and would not have happened unless God himself had orchestrated them. I fully recognize that and feel so blessed that I finally shut up and listened to that amazing voice calling me to the path I have always been drawn to but ignored until that day.
Rejuvenation: My spirit is very much rejuvenated today. I have began a whole new path in my spiritual life. I was raised in a Christian home and attended a Presbyterian church. For many years after college I avoided the church and had many questions.
When I moved to MN I made a promise to go back to church. I began at a Presbyterian Church which was filled with many beautiful people and was a very positive experience, although I still felt incomplete or that something was lacking.
The faith I am discerning is Catholicism. If someone said to me a year ago that I would actively seek the Catholic faith I probably would have slapped my knee in laughter. It would have seemed so out of my realm of possibility. I used to be so closed off to any other way of thinking other than what I already believed.
I am trying to determine exactly when I realized I wanted to learn more about the Catholic faith. I have thought long and hard about this and I realize over the last year I have been asking my close friend (who is Catholic) many questions about the differences between Protestantism and Catholicism.
It's not like anyone said to me, "hey, become Catholic, it's the greatest religion out there."
I don't think it's accidental in the big scheme of things that God drew me to Duluth and now I work for a Catholic hospital. I know it's no accident being drawn to the chapel weekly and sitting quietly in prayer and asking weekly for his guidance on my journey.
The day I went to mass this summer at a small Catholic church I remember this feeling of awesomeness washing over me. I remember taking it all in from the statues, the candles, the songs, the prayers, the ornate and gorgeous altar to just how it felt in that very moment to be part of the mass. I felt alive.
That feeling has not left me. That feeling has inspired me to join a Catholic church here in Duluth. I am now 6 weeks into the Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults (RCIA) where I am learning the rich history and traditions of the Catholic faith.
It is the most amazing gift I have ever given myself. My soul is rejuvenated on so many levels. For the very first time I feel the empty void in my heart has been filled. I could never explain the empty feeling. I always assumed it was material objects. Such as, if I had more money I would be happier. If I had this type of relationship, then I would be complete. If my job was like this, then I would be happier. It was none of those things.
I am finding when you open your heart to what God has planned for you...EVERYTHING falls into place....you are taken care of on every level. You are never alone so you never have to feel scared. You just have to have Faith that everything is how it is supposed to be according to His plan and that He loves you and will never, ever leave you. I have Faith that what is meant to be in my life is meant to be and will happen exactly when it is meant to happen.
I am Renewed. I am Reborn. I am Rejuvenated.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
My Not-So-Secret, Secret
This weekend when visiting family, my cousin Lauren brought to my attention that I was truly living The Secret. I, of course, did not know what she was talking about as I had never heard of the book called The Secret which apparently is a very inspiring book which describes in great detail how we create our lives, with every thought every minute of every day.
The premise of this book is one in which you harness your own power of positive thinking. In that sense, I would agree that yes, without a doubt I am living and embracing the secret.
However, I believe calling it a secret seems kind of silly. It's no secret to me. It's pretty obvious if I am in a positive space, people respond positively to me. It also stands to reason if I open my heart and mind to the endless possibilities out there and recognize there is a greater higher plan in place for me then that plan seems to fall into place all on its own.
I realize by not needing to know exactly what road is ahead of me subsequently, frees up my mind to enjoy the journey and not be bogged down with the day to day worries of each little detail of said journey. Again, positivity is gained through lack of worry.
So in essence, by letting go of preconceived notions of how or what I think my life SHOULD be and focus on what I WANT in my life seems to attract the positive actions into my life.
I will often say, "from my lips to God's ears" and what started off as a joke, is something I genuinely believe. I no longer believe in coincidences, as I know everything happens for a reason at a specific time at exactly the moment it is meant to happen.
When I am in the chapel during my lunch period at work and sit and do centering prayer I hear Him. I sit there with my mind as a blank canvas and focus solely on one word like, "blessed" or "grateful" or "strength" and work very hard to not let my mind wander to the daily worries or stresses. I use the one word to keep me focused on listening to what God has to say to me.
By the end of my time I feel centered, focused, relaxed, blessed, loved and unburdened and ready to face anything on my path. If that means that I am living the "secret" then I want to share that secret with you.
Go and find that place within you that makes you feel shiny, beautiful, special, loved, centered, enlightened, peaceful, relieved, happy, joyous and above all creative in the knowledge that you are YOU and that there is nobody on this earth exactly like you.
Celebrate all that you are and give thanks to the one who created you in His image. You can never ever be too humble or too gracious.
I am deeply blessed and I know my path is the most amazing road ahead of me to date...and I cannot wait for the journey each and every day!!!
The premise of this book is one in which you harness your own power of positive thinking. In that sense, I would agree that yes, without a doubt I am living and embracing the secret.
However, I believe calling it a secret seems kind of silly. It's no secret to me. It's pretty obvious if I am in a positive space, people respond positively to me. It also stands to reason if I open my heart and mind to the endless possibilities out there and recognize there is a greater higher plan in place for me then that plan seems to fall into place all on its own.
I realize by not needing to know exactly what road is ahead of me subsequently, frees up my mind to enjoy the journey and not be bogged down with the day to day worries of each little detail of said journey. Again, positivity is gained through lack of worry.
So in essence, by letting go of preconceived notions of how or what I think my life SHOULD be and focus on what I WANT in my life seems to attract the positive actions into my life.
I will often say, "from my lips to God's ears" and what started off as a joke, is something I genuinely believe. I no longer believe in coincidences, as I know everything happens for a reason at a specific time at exactly the moment it is meant to happen.
When I am in the chapel during my lunch period at work and sit and do centering prayer I hear Him. I sit there with my mind as a blank canvas and focus solely on one word like, "blessed" or "grateful" or "strength" and work very hard to not let my mind wander to the daily worries or stresses. I use the one word to keep me focused on listening to what God has to say to me.
By the end of my time I feel centered, focused, relaxed, blessed, loved and unburdened and ready to face anything on my path. If that means that I am living the "secret" then I want to share that secret with you.
Go and find that place within you that makes you feel shiny, beautiful, special, loved, centered, enlightened, peaceful, relieved, happy, joyous and above all creative in the knowledge that you are YOU and that there is nobody on this earth exactly like you.
Celebrate all that you are and give thanks to the one who created you in His image. You can never ever be too humble or too gracious.
I am deeply blessed and I know my path is the most amazing road ahead of me to date...and I cannot wait for the journey each and every day!!!
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Follow With Your Heart
I truly am starting to believe that God wants me to be happy all the time. Not just some of the time, but all of the time. I understand that may sound really bizarre but if you could put yourself in my shoes you would see precisely what I am talking about.
It's as if he knows what is important to me, what makes me feel good, inspired, enlightened, uplifted and places those experiences/adventures before me. He makes them possible.
This weekend was supposed to be dismal weatherwise at best. It was to rain, storm, then rain some more and perhaps some hail thrown in for good measure.
My plan was to go to visit my co-adventurer Saturday and spend the day out on a lake fishing. Well, you can't fish if it's storming. We talked on the phone early that morning and decided I would still make the 75 mile trip and we would plan to do other things since the weather forecast was not looking so fantastic.
I swear not even 15 miles out of Duluth, the sky turned this pretty shade of peach and I could see the sun poking from behind the thick cloud cover. By the time I got to my friend's house the sun was shining and there was no rain in sight. We quickly packed the boat, drove to the lake and proceeded to have a miraculous day of fishing.
It's like He knows what I need then provides it. This past week at work I networked with some big names at my hospital and because of my new attitude of gratitude I will probably be in a new position within the next 3 months. None of that happens on accident. It happens because I am making changes in my life through allowing him to walk with me daily, and feeling gracious for all my daily blessings.
I think my attitude of gratitude not only helps me to recognize my daily blessings but seems to allow the blessings to pour over me on a very regular basis. In all honesty, it would have been okay if our fishing trip had been postponed, but thanks to some prayer, positive thinking and Him I not only got one day of fishing, but two as we went back again today!!
I am not sure I'll get the reference exactly right but I know that when Jesus was talking to the fishermen he told them they could fish that day and eat for that day or follow him and never go hungry or lack for anything. It is absolutely true, I lack for nothing thanks to Him and allowing his presence to be recognized in my daily life.
I am so blessed for a home, job, food on my table, a car, friends, family, clothing, my health....my entire life...good and bad for it makes me what I am today.
It's as if he knows what is important to me, what makes me feel good, inspired, enlightened, uplifted and places those experiences/adventures before me. He makes them possible.
This weekend was supposed to be dismal weatherwise at best. It was to rain, storm, then rain some more and perhaps some hail thrown in for good measure.
My plan was to go to visit my co-adventurer Saturday and spend the day out on a lake fishing. Well, you can't fish if it's storming. We talked on the phone early that morning and decided I would still make the 75 mile trip and we would plan to do other things since the weather forecast was not looking so fantastic.
I swear not even 15 miles out of Duluth, the sky turned this pretty shade of peach and I could see the sun poking from behind the thick cloud cover. By the time I got to my friend's house the sun was shining and there was no rain in sight. We quickly packed the boat, drove to the lake and proceeded to have a miraculous day of fishing.
It's like He knows what I need then provides it. This past week at work I networked with some big names at my hospital and because of my new attitude of gratitude I will probably be in a new position within the next 3 months. None of that happens on accident. It happens because I am making changes in my life through allowing him to walk with me daily, and feeling gracious for all my daily blessings.
I think my attitude of gratitude not only helps me to recognize my daily blessings but seems to allow the blessings to pour over me on a very regular basis. In all honesty, it would have been okay if our fishing trip had been postponed, but thanks to some prayer, positive thinking and Him I not only got one day of fishing, but two as we went back again today!!
I am not sure I'll get the reference exactly right but I know that when Jesus was talking to the fishermen he told them they could fish that day and eat for that day or follow him and never go hungry or lack for anything. It is absolutely true, I lack for nothing thanks to Him and allowing his presence to be recognized in my daily life.
I am so blessed for a home, job, food on my table, a car, friends, family, clothing, my health....my entire life...good and bad for it makes me what I am today.
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